WANTED: Local Fort Collins Instagram Husbands
Fort Collins women (and some men) actively seeking full time Instagram Husbands. Start Date: Immediate. Salary: n/a. Benefits: I don't think I want to get into that.
A strong candidate must comprehend basic iPhone photography skills, and always be present and willing to work when flattering lighting and good hair days provide opportune moments.
We're looking for someone who
- can confidently determine a 'good angle.'
- has a passion for cute shoe pics.
- does not remark on our vanity or narcissism.
- never ever chooses a bad filter.
A positive, outgoing attitude is nonnegotiable, and creative input a bonus. As long as it doesn't suck.
An example of an ideal Instagram Husband is someone who will
- hike Horsetooth with us and say, 'The back lighting is amazing right now, please let me capture this moment so all of your friends can 'like' it, and know that you're active and adventurous,' all without letting them see that we actually sweat.
- take us out to Pour Bros. and tell us, 'Candidly sip on that craft beer while I snap a photo of the 'DRINKS' marquee behind you. Your hair today is so on point; we're not letting that go to waste.'
- walk with us in Old Town and never roll their eyes when we see a really cool brick wall that compliments our outfit.
- enjoy a pretty Bindle latte with us, and snap a pic as if we just unknowingly get photographed while drinking lattes in public. And don't you dare make us ask you to do it.
If this sounds like the job for you, please inquire with... well... uh. We didn't think anyone actually would want to. Check out this awesome video about Instagram Husbands, and see if you're still down.